l 0 v 3
is when two people who cares for each other gets confused

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`i've waited all my life
`to cross this ~~line~~
`to the only thing that's true

Thursday, February 28, 2008

today's chill out is really good i say.

'Daryl, let's do it ya. man, im really keen on it. i think it can work you know. like seriously. hahah. alrite alrite, we will continue this soon. like tm during dinner. hahah. :D'

and this part is for you (Daryl Boy):
im glad to find a soulmate/mentor-disciple/bitching-partner/ultimate-gossiper/smoking-karkee/dinner-partner/movie-goer/train-bus-companion etc etc and maybe this. and it's a bonus we live so near to each other. omg. you rock my socks mans. hahahahha.

and that's thanks to andrew/emily. grin.

come to think of it, where did she disappear to today?
with xxxxxx? oops. :D:D

`l am my own man
5:57 PM.

Monday, February 18, 2008

have you ever thought of ure worth in ure friends' eyes? the value you hold in each and every close companion? normally one wouldnt contemplate such a thought unless it is ignited by, let's say, a particular event.

the word friendship spans a good number of years in both its formation and dying stages. or rather some do not die an instant death, but rather, fade into the distant unknown. many friendship torches dim and burn a fiery flame throughout time, but very rarely, but yes it still does happen, a cap is forced upon a particular flame, and the fire cease to burn again. those that didnt manage to cease altogether, probably manage a weak flame, but definitely not a robust state as it formerly was.

close loyal friends stay by ure side. you give them excesses for mistakes and try not to commit any felony of any degree yourself. true friendship shines through ure darkest patch, unwavering, steadfast, and you recognise it in an instant. there's so many friendships you hold dear to you. so many loves you have in your heart. and sometimes, even when some loves turn around and poke you real hard, often unintentionally but yet knowingly, you would still find some room in your heart to forgive them.

some friends never even get close to entering your heart. a few of those relentlessly pour forth unkind words of such that no longer borders around ignorance and naivety, but selfishness, not to think of the dire consequences, and with a final recognition, a hint of unyielding malignment. how their swords slash wildly and draw crimson. oh it's easy to simply shrug off the damage and blame, for a supposed pure rationality, but just remember wont you, the hurt induced by such an indifferent act it seems to you.

i find the existence of such people, or rather such actions hard to believe in.

`l am my own man
7:03 PM.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

valentine was just two days ago. haven had the time to update even before cause i was like out everyday.

well, met up with audrey together with andrew. had a really good time catching up. she has been gone for one year and if not for her refused entry into the States (forgive me but it's a miracle), bet we probably wont get to meet up for another couple of years and clear up the misunderstanding that stemmed from years ago.

met up with aunt marg on thursday and we went for a movie marathon. it was a blast. haven had the luxury for such indulgence for ages. but we only managed to catch P.S. I Love You and Kungfu Dunk. the first one is really good. if you guys haven happen to catch it, do it soon. trust me, it's worth the ride.

to mark this year's valentine, i wrote a little song with a really repetitive if not monotonous tune (i mean what can you expect with kris' innate musical talent right).

oh well, here goes :)

Love is when you look into her eyes
and you see love reflecting in her iris
Love is when your lips touch
and you feel like you can do this for a lifetime
Love is when her words cut you deep
yet you forgive her easily
Love is hurt, love is pain, love is remembering
Love is her lingering presence even when she's gone
Love is believing in yourself and in her
Love is courage that moves you along
Love is there to hold you close at night
Love is that letting go though it breaks your heart
Love is wishing her happiness
and the best things that the world has to offer
Love is loving her and keeping her in your heart
Love is weeks, months and years ahead
and you know she will always be somewhere close.

The Trapeze Swinger in Good Company

`l am my own man
9:58 PM.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

thursday, first day of the lunar new year.

i believe our friendship has just reached a new level.

just that bit higher. (is that possible?)

cheers my friend.. and love love for the many many more good years ahead.

`l am my own man
1:28 AM.

Wednesday, February 06, 2008

im finally back.

it feels almost alien to speak again to the white keyboard on which my finger tips press gently against.

a wave of nostalgia surfaces almost involuntary. a certain emotion i have been trying to move away from in my life. now, i think im about ready to face it all again.

the past few weeks have been quite something.

letting my hair down and simply not give a damn about anything else going on around me make me feel like im breathing and alive once more.

i took kane's advice and attempted a 'change of scenery' to get away from messed up emotions, certainly the wisest decision i have made so far.

today, i feel almost close to being me again. to be just a mere few steps behind to saying that im fine and that heartache is none but a recent remnant of my past which i am finally able to leave it to where it should remain.

been having a crazy one week tonning out with andrew, wendy, daryl, lerrick, kim, meow and the HUGE gang (among which four of them actually live in yishun too). and last night, for the first time in my life, i was lying on the ramp at skate park looking up at the stars scattered sky with Singtel looming at the foreground. for a long while as i lay there quietly, my heart felt like it was finally at peace with itself again.

thanks to the good old and new company, there's really little room to contain any form of unhappiness that still suspends vaguely in the air.

to the other K and 7may (my God, i still cant believe it), thanks for the quiet companionship you have never failed to deliver at any moment in time. it is exactly what i need and im just so so glad to find someone like you, so new and tender a friendship yet with such strong unwavering support and understanding.

and to that particular wednesday night when i was such a wreck, thanks also for being there and not probing.

i have not thank you quite enough and so, thanks for the random bus ride you jumped on with me even if it's with an unbelievable look, the failed durian feast (due to the alcohol earlier on) but a rambutan-and-grapes treat instead as make up, the frog porridge and finally macs breakfast at boat quay. i cant quite recall having eaten so much in just one night and i nearly forgot the sashimi, chanwanmushi and dessert which i downed with hot sake at ure place when i first arrived.

thanks for all these and more. ure just- such an impossibly hard-to-come-by good friend.

at times when i would rather sit and chill alone, i would see you walk over now and then to check on me and keep me company silently. i didnt say anything then, but dont think i dont see it all, i simply kept it all inside. i guess it's because you are you, a taurus and also a 7may, that maybe you can almost read and feel my thoughts without having to ask. and maybe that's the reason you simply sit beside silently, cause you know that is what i most needed.

coming may..

let's go for an escapade together with the rest.

and did i also say that ure a newly-made member in my circle of trust?

i really not know what else to say but 'thank you'. thanks for being there.
it means a lot.

i took another chance, took a fall, took a shot for you.
now it's finally time to wake up and move on.
i guess it's true after all what they have said.
love is neverlasting and it will never be no matter how much you believe it to be.

`l am my own man
7:02 PM.